So tonight my five year old and i went out for dinner with my husband's 2nd cousin. She's an awesome older lady, though i'm not quite sure exactly how old she is. I do know that she's lived in her current house for 45 years. She has four grown sons. Many grandkids too. One of her grandkids is even a lawyer. Most of all, I know she's amazing. She's fabulous, but a spring chicken she is not.
I've always been drawn to cousin Martha. Her warm smile, her loving heart, her wonderfully positive outlook on life. Her generosity. Even just tonight, after supper, we went back to chat at her place. Right away, she gave my boy a huge Lindt chocolate bar and let him fill his pockets with hershey kisses. He was smitten from the first kiss.
At dinner, as we shared our classic Greek salad and brown bread, we laughed and laughed. Chatting with her was like chatting to a girlfriend. A contemporary. We talked about Argentina, France and what's going down in Greece. We discussed family and friendships and everything in between.
Martha lost her husband many years ago, but never did lose herself. Just looking at her, you know that she's a woman filled with vim. Her hair is perfectly kept. I know for a fact that she gets it done with John each friday before meeting a girlfriend for breakfast next door. Her shellacked nails were the most lovely shade of purple. Perhaps you'd call it lilac? The nails matched her gorgeous purple patterned sweater and it was wonderful. Who knew a paint choice could be so important?
While we dined, people passed by and warmly greeted her. I felt like i was sitting with the queen. She laughed and disagreed when i told her she was like royalty. Never would she consider herself a queen. Or even a princess.
To me she's a superwoman and i wish we could have hung out forever.
She told me about how her husband fell ill with Parkinsons many years earlier. The best part of his illness was the male caregiver, Alex, they hired to help out. Alex cried like a baby when her husband passed away. Martha says he was like a brother to them.
Twenty four years later, Alex is still part of their family. Till this day she holds him in the highest esteem because he cared for her David so lovingly. As a recent gift, she sent Alex and his family home to the Philipines for the month. Plane tickets and all. Why? Because she said he deserved it. I think i saw a tear in her eye...
I was sad when we had to say our goodbyes, but we were getting tired. But I left feeling enlightened and happy. Warm and safe. I drove home having a better understanding of who I am and what i want to be known as in my circle.
I went into my house feeling okay about the situation i'm in. Just fine with the big fight i'm having with a friend. As a matter of fact, now i feel totally at peace with the fact that i'm no longer talking to this said friend. Why? Because i wasn't impressed by how she treated people. My cleaning lady. My babysitter. My son. And me. Unlike cousin Martha, she's not kind to others.
Perhaps one day she and I will make up, but it will never be the same. Aunt Martha doesn't stand on ceremony with people she loves, but she only loves those who are worthy. Life's too short and life's too long. No time to be with the wrong people and not enough time to be with the right ones.
I'm excited about spending more hours with cousin Martha. I think next time i'll wear purple too.
lots of love,
xo
